Weighing emotions . . .

Again had another inspiring chat with my sis this morning on the way to work. She saw a movie called 'Dor' from which she grasped a very interesting thought and voila, I decide to expand on that and post.

So, we all are going through some phase in our lives. Some of us are trying hard to get a good grade in that Math midterm, some busy getting into college . . . others desperately wanting to get out ... first job, new relationship, marriage, retirement .... you get the point! In each of these phases, we face certain problems and certain pleasures. Problems which can stress us out, which we want to discuss and pleasures we want to celebrate about and share with the world. But the moment we pass one phase and enter a new one with a brand new set of issues, we forget how significant those old ones were to us.

Let me use an example to explain where I am going. My sis and I regularly talk while we drive to and fro work. We discuss things which are important to each of us. She just finished applying to residency programs all over the US and is also on her way of expanding her family of two. Me, on the other hand, can't stop talking about the hottie at work, the folly that made my boss frown, the crush that I have, etc. etc. Those are things on her mind and these on mine. The only thing that has managed to makes our talks so inviting and beautiful is that none of us belittles the others emotions. I am sure there are times she feels like telling me, "Hmm . . . I need to get into med school and here she is going on & on about how this cute guy at work talked to her for 2 mins!" And similarly, she sometimes cribs about how her hubby didn't take out the trash or he didn't take her out for dinner when promised and yes, I do feel like telling her - "helllo, atleast you are happily married with a loving hubby." But the fact is, who are we to quantify the pain or happiness that others experience? Who are we to say that my problem is worse than yours or I should be rejoicing more than you? For each of us, whatever we are going through today, is *the* most important thing.

And so here is another thing I need to add to my syllabus - never devalue what someone else is going through cause to them it's as important as that which you feel important today!

And before I forget, the scene from the movie which generated this post is a conversation between 2 women. One whose husband has just died, consoles the other, whose husband is missing. She starts of saying - "It's not that bad, atleast you have hope to find him again!" but immediately takes it back. She realizes that each of them feels enormous amount of grief in the situation they are in and it's incorrect to quantify or compare one to the other.