A different kind of running!
When in a relationship, do you feel like you are always in this mini chase? One seems to eternally running behind or away from one another. If he is running behind you, you show some disinterest. The minute he shows some disinterest, you go chasing him. I guess it's what keeps the interest going. Cause if it was just a one way chase, it would be mighty boring. But what happens, when one forgets to stop chasing and be chased. Is that the relationships doom? Also does that really have to be a conscious decision or does it happen naturally in the "good - meant-to-be relationships"? Or have I just been in too many relationships where aimless "mind games" have been played? Am I talking gibberish here?
posted by Mommy G @ 8:14 AM
9 Comments:
At 1/15/2008 5:55 PM,
Anonymous said…
I am not a relationship expert, but sill I think a real relationship is not about any mini or large marathon chase. Although one might have to chase the other person for getting started with the relationship. But once you are in a true relationship it's not about chasing or being chased, it's about enjoying the moments to the best you can without worrying about too many things. (This seems too filmi like hindi movies)
And again if the chase starts it's gonna end some time with atleast one person getting hurt or going in to deep thinking process. So the relationships without any chases are the real relationships or that's the way I know them to be.
I think when you are in a true relationship you feel like you are in a bubble where you don't see the outside world, you don't get bothered by small things, you just live your life with a feeling that you are on top of the world.
At 1/15/2008 6:23 PM,
Improper Bostonian said…
Are you really an accountant??? I kinda get an impression that your day job is as a columnist for a dating portal where you discuss about various issues women face in a dating game...
so you post a few questions, and somehow manage to extract some info from unsuspecting desis, and pass it as an article, in yahoo or other portals, as if analyzing dating from different view points!!!
Did I uncover your secrets??? :-)
At 1/15/2008 6:50 PM,
Anonymous said…
Nice work there IB. Are you a psychiatrist by any chance? The way you have uncovered the secrets in 3-4 lines, wow ......what can I say ......awesome......Keep up the good work IB.......
At 1/15/2008 7:46 PM,
Mommy G said…
Anony1: True! I agree with what you said. I guess my post was talking to "the beginning of a new relationship". Yes, once the commitment is established, the chase doesn't really make sense. The chase is possible only where insecurity thrives which is usually during the new beginnings. Looking fwd to that bubble! :)
IB: Accountant??? Who is an accountant??
Anony2(assuming diff. from anony1): LOL!
At 1/16/2008 2:37 AM,
Improper Bostonian said…
Arielle: your profile says you work in accounting, so I thought you are an accountant...:-)
anony2: thanks for your kind words...its very nice of you to acknowledge...but the guess abt Arielle's day job is not based on this post alone, but in the context of larger blog itself...if you read all her posts, and fine a empirical mean, you will notice it trends towards like this post, especially the ones offlate...i dont think one has to be a psychiatrist to say what I said earlier...
At 1/16/2008 2:50 AM,
Anonymous said…
its well and true..but i feel its only when we get conscious abt the chase, it becomes a mind game!!!
and yeah when the chase ends, the relationship too...but at diff stages the chase is also gonna be diff..not just running behind each other
and i find the concept of bubble from anony1 to be a "BS" bec it really confines your world and will end up being monotonous n boring!!!
and the relationship goes well with your earlier post on "Acceptance" but theres no one like "My Type" bec our demands keeps changing from time to time..
so just stop thinking too much and start living!!! good luck!!
R
At 1/16/2008 5:14 AM,
Mommy G said…
IB: Well that;s changed now! :P haha!
Anony3: I really need to stop thinking so much!! :)
At 1/29/2008 3:03 AM,
zaph said…
the chase ends with wedding vows and then we all settle down for large helpings of domestic drudgery
At 1/29/2008 1:35 PM,
Anonymous said…
Here's another comment from me-- & no I'm not hounding you! just taking a break on winter afternoon & couldn't help post some comments! Your blog is interesting & I don't like sharing my thoughts with strangers but what the hell....
People chase because they see something worth chasing in spite of their ego (& sometimes their self respect)...people like being chased 'cos its attention after all....
When the chaser's seems to cool off, the chasee realizes that the chaser actually cares for them -- more than the chasee's "friends" sometimes! And the chaser & chasee exchange roles!
& yeah! sometimes when the both parties lose interest or are tired of bothering too much, it all dies down! Happens!
But somewhere along the way when the chaser & chasee can honestly confront their feelings & put their egos aside to admit they care enough is when you see the "real thing"
A far as "mind games" are concerned, they should just chase you away .... unless that's what you enjoy and that's why you are in the chase in the first pace.....
think about it! :)
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